Scars

Recently, my 15-year-old son came to me with concern about some marks that were on his shoulders. I examined him and found that he had stretch marks across his shoulders. A result from growing like a weed no doubt. I explained to him what stretch marks were and told him not to worry and that everyone has them. He wanted to know when they would go away and to his horror, I told him they would not go away. He said, “You mean they are scars?”. Again, I reassured him that everyone has them. As I spoke those words, I felt the sting of how true that statement truly is.

I certainly have scars. Some of my scars are visible and I carry them proudly. I have scars on my hands that my boys love to tell everyone about. They are from when I was a girl and I gathered eggs with my family in chicken houses. When we would gather eggs, the chickens did not always cooperate, and they would peck us on our hands and I still have scars from those chickens. I have a scar from 2 c-sections, also. I am very proud of that scar. I endured a c-section twice and proudly carry my scar and the pain that was endured all for my boys.

Some of my scars come from mistakes. I have a scar on my forehead from playing at my grandparents’ home. I was running outside with my sisters and took the corner too sharp around the old smokehouse and hit my head on the corner where a piece of the roof hung too low. I also have nonphysical scars you cannot see. These come from mistakes, poor choices, and sin. There are scars from mistakes that I have made as a young adult, a married woman, and as a mom. There are scars from failed friendships, times I hurt people I love and times that I have disappointed God and been disobedient (more times than I care to admit). I carry all these scars.

I have other scars that I wish I did not have. These were given by other people to me. These are not of my own doing. These are from things I would have never chosen; however, I have to endure. I have hurts from my childhood; things that cut me deep to this day. Hurts and pain that the Lord has been so gentle and kind to allow me to finally learn how to bring to the light and begin to heal.

Web MD has this to say about scars…

“Now a scar isn’t bad if it’s small or in a location that’s easy to conceal. But when it is not, you may wonder if there is a way to treat it, other than hiding it, that will make it go away or at least change how it looks. The truth is that scars will never completely go away. But there are some methods that can help reduce its size and change its appearance. Scarring is a natural part of the healing process. Its appearance and its treatment depend on multiple factors.”

Web MD is right. We try and hide these scars; conceal them and pretend we do not have them. This will not make them go away. I have tried to conceal mine. I have tried to forget and bury them. This will not work and does not work. The only way to move forward is for the Lord to heal us and to free us of these scars. Only God has the power to heal scars. If you allow him, he will take even the painful ones and give them purpose. God tells us he will restore and heal our wounds in Jeremiah 30:17…

“‘But I will restore you to health and heal your wounds,’ declares the LORD…”

Isaiah 38;16-17 says…

“You restored me to health and let me live. Surely it was for my benefit that I suffered such anguish. In your love you kept me from the pit of destruction; you have put all my sins behind your back.”

What?! How can something so painful or revolting be for my benefit? This is what I have learned along the way about my scars. Scars can help us. They help us not to repeat mistakes. Our scars can help others. Our scars can grow us closer to God.

How can something so revolting be for our benefit? I cannot think of anything more revolting than maggots. Just to think of all that horror in my garbage in hot Texas summer makes me cringe and my stomach turn. However, here are gross and amazing facts. Maggots are healers and used in all kinds of therapy for wounds. They eat up the diseased flesh but leave the healthy flesh alone. In fact, doctors have discovered that in many cases maggots are more effective than antibiotics! I told you gross and amazing. Sometimes our hurts are like maggots. They may be very unpleasant, but they can also be healing. Our scars cause us to identify what’s important, and to develop endurance and perseverance, to depend more on God and others. And in doing so they are eating away the rotting parts of our scars and leaving behind the healthy parts.

God makes something so beautiful out of our scars. God does not allow scars just to remind us that we have been hurt. God gives us scars to remind us that we have been healed, we have been delivered and set free. When we bring our wounds, secrets and shame, we make HIM the Healer of our lives. He uses our scars for His purposes and leaves only the healthy parts behind.

Christ knows about scars. He carries scars with Him as well. He knows all too well about where scars come from and their purpose. He carries scars for each of us and it is by those scars we can find the healing we so desperately need. Because of God’s great love for us, Christ bears the scars of the cross so we can find the ultimate healing in salvation that was made possible because Christ chose the scars he knew we could never carry. Everyone has scars. Let us choose to bring them to the light, find their purpose and heal.

Ask me about my scars. I will tell you about them. I will tell you how the Lord has healed some of them and how we are still working on others.

I pray that you find the purpose and healing in your own scars. Do not hide or be ashamed of those scars anymore. It is time to find healing.

Tyler Settle
Women’s Ministry Coordinator | Receptionist